This was the question I got out of the blue as I was driving nine-year-old B yesterday evening.
I should tell you we don't do the vampire stuff in our house. At least not yet. I don't watch True Blood. We don't even have cable. We haven't read those vampire books, you know the ones, where the teen girl fawns over the boy and says she'll love him even if he bites her and wrecks her life. And they look at each other longingly, a lot. I can't think of the name... you know the ones.
I paused and asked B what it would mean to me if Dada was, indeed, a vampire. How would that impact my life? Because I'd really need to know.
B told me that if I got bitten I would become a vampire and would not be alive any more. I couldn't see my reflection. I'd have to stay away from people. I'd have to avoid the sunlight and only come out at night. I'd want to drink blood.
Hm. I thought.
"Well, I guess I'd have a talk with Dada and I'd tell him that he could be a vampire but that I wasn't interested in being a vampire. So please do not bite me. He can be what he wants. But I can also be what I want and he shouldn't try to change me."
I am not even kidding. It's like the 70's Free to Be, You and Me album got pureed in a blender together with, well, blood and vampire fangs along with some parenting 101 course. I don't know what was happening to the words coming out of my mouth. But then I said this:
"Dada is a vegetarian and I'm not. We don't try to change each other. Just like he could be a vampire and I wouldn't have to be."
Jumping Josephine on a pogo stick! WTF?
But of course, then I had another thought.
Vampire = Vegetarian = ...
wait for it ...
Foreign Service Officer?!?!
Could it be?
Blood sausage for dinner, anyone?
In other news... I got my hair cut tonight and I now have what looks like a mullet instead of "side-swept wispy bangs," so that should be fun at the bus stop tomorrow. I'm hoping it looks a bit better when I have a hand in styling it. It ain't pretty, people. But that's what I get for trying the new girl. Pouf and Mullet. Free to Be.